Water Night

Night with the eyes of a horse that trembles in the night,
night with eyes of water in the field asleep
is in your eyes, a horse that trembles,
is in your eyes of secret water.
Eyes of shadow-water,
eyes of well-water,
eyes of dream-water.
Silence and solitude,
two little animals moon-led,
drink in your eyes,
drink in those waters.
If you open your eyes,
night opens, doors of musk,
the secret kingdom of the water opens
flowing from the center of night.
And if you close your eyes,
a river fills you from within,
flows forward, darkens you:
night brings its wetness to beaches in your soul.
Octavio Paz, 1914-1998
(Adapted by Eric Whitacre, Translation by Muriel Rukeyser)

I'm a huge fan of Eric Whitacre's choral music. One of the cool things that he does is set up a virtual choir, where people from all over the world record themselves singing one of his pieces, and sound/video technicians mesh all the videos together into one massive choir. This year's virtual choir piece is 'Water Night', text above. The music complements the poetry beautifully. As a first soprano, I love being given the opportunity to let my voice soar up to the A-flats around the line 'If you open your eyes...'. I also love the melodies given to the inner parts, particularly the altos at the very end. And the bass E-flats make me melt.

Last year, my choir sang another of Eric Whitacre's pieces, 'When David Heard', and there was a bit of a disagreement about how to sing the opening section. One of the guys in my choir asked Eric on his facebook page, and he actually replied. So not only is he an amazing composer, but a nice bloke, too!

So if anybody wants to join in this amazing, international project, here's the link:

http://virtualchoir.ericwhitacre.com/

Weddings and the Other City

Please note: The following is to be read with a tone of melodrama. When I am upset by something silly that I can't fix, my tendency i to cheer myself up by exaggerating my perceived problems until they reach the point of melodrama.

For some reason, a lot of my friends have decided to get married in a short pace of time. Two have decided to start my wedding season with a double-whammy of weddings on the same weekend. So I've recently attended two beautiful ceremonies, complete with blushing brides and dashing grooms. This is all well and good, but weddings can be bittersweet occasions for the singles among our number. It may be simply the double dose of in-your-face, loved-up coupledom, but it's taken me a little longer than usual to bounce back to my cheery self.

I'll talk more about wedding number 2, because this is the one that's got me a little blue. Probably because after wedding number 1, I jumped in the car and drove for five hours in order to get to wedding number 2.

Photos were taken, vows were exchanged, ritual was undertaken and suddenly a married couple stood where my two single friends had been. I congratulated the bride and groom, caught up with friends, and had tea and biscuits. So far, so good.

Then the reception started. I bade farewell to the friends wha hadn't been invited (including a young man who I was hoping would be my fake-date for the evening), drank champagne, ate deep fried canapes, found my seat and introduced myself to the people on my table. Again, so far, so good.

Roast beef was eaten (never more welcome than when staying with my vegetarian grandmother), speeches were given, toasts were offered, the coversation was as light and effervescent as the champagne. Coffee and cake were served and then it was time for the bridal waltz. And that's where things started to go downhill for my mood. The new Mr and Mrs danced well (it was more of a bridal ceroc, but bridal waltz just sounds cooler), but when it came time for others to join them on the floor, I realised that I was an odd-numbered wheel. (Some would have stopped that sentence at 'odd'.) I love dancing, and would have loved to join, but had to wait until the traditional twosome two-step disintegrated into the every-man-for-himself boogie. I wanted to dance with somebody. I wanted to feel the heat with somebody. Yeah, I wanted to dance with somebody, with somebody who loves me.

I conveniently had to go to the bathroom to touch up my lipstick as the bride threw her bouquet into the waiting gaggle of girls (who, consolingly, were predominantly intelligent women in their 20s, rather than the rest of the youth group girls, as is so often the case in Christian circles). After farewelling the bride and groom, I decided to call it a night and head home to my 93-year-old grandmother, who had insisted on waiting up for me, despite the fact it was past 11pm.

As I tried to go to sleep, watching the hour hand tick past 2am, I couldn't help but think about what my life would be like if I were married. Especially if I were married to a particular man I know who's handsome, funny, intelligent, well-muscled, mature, attractive, musical, a strong Christian, athletic, has beautiful eyes. And did I mention that he's drop-dead-gorgeous? Contrasting this imagined life with my current, actual real life as a lonely loner, walking down a lonely road, alone, didn't stack up too well as the hour of the morning became yet more ridiculous. I tried to convince myself that I don't need to get married, because Jesus is enough, and God has a plan for me, and His timing is perfect, but even my alternate personality wasn't listening to me. Way to go, sista, deserting me at my time of need.

At a later stage, this post's sequel will be a more serious look at love and life as a Christian (because it's not like the internet isn't full of that already), but in the meantime, I suppose the moral of the story is:

Don't touch the coffee after 9pm!

20 Questions

I stole these questions from Chronicler over at 'Annals of a Christian Single'. It seemed like a nice, easy blog post for a lazy Sunday afternoon, when I really should be having a busy Sunday afternoon doing the things that didn't happen on Saturday. Never mind.

 

1.  What's the nerdiest and/or weirdest thing about you? 
I have a strange ability to have detailed and in-depth conversations with myself. This seems to occur just about every time I'm alone.  

2. If you could live in a fictional universe from any book, movie,  or television show, what would it be?
I always liked the idea of the Oxford that Lyra lives in, from the series 'His Dark Materials'. Having your soul living outside your body as a shape-shifting animal that can talk to you would be pretty awesome. (See question one for more about conversations with myself.)

3. Little or big, practical or frivolous, what are a few of your favorite items in your house?
Since I don't really have the lifestyle stability to own a real piano (I don't know where I'll be living in a month, let alone a year or five),  I love my full length, weighted and touch sensitive keyboard that fits in my tiny little car, and is light enough for me to carry all by myself. My bed is also pretty cool. It has a comfy mattress and snuggly blankies. I also love my black leather and suede shoes that are cute enough to get compliments every time I wear them, and comfy enough to wear all the time.

4. Do you like animated movies? If so, what is your favorite?   
I suppose it depends on the movie - there is too much variety within animations to group them all together. My favourite movie of all time is an animated movie - Beauty and the Beast. The animation is spectacularly beautiful, and the songs are closer to perfect than anything else I've come across. 

5. What is your least favorite household chore?
Vacuuming. I hate the noise that a vacuum cleaner makes.  

6. What's your favorite thing to get at Starbucks (or favorite coffee shop)? 
Truth be told, I've never bought anything from starbucks. I'd rather support a local, independent cafe than a multinational chain. Plus, the closest starbucks is about 3000 km away. When I order coffee, my standard order is a cappucino.

7. What is your favorite pizza topping?
Supreme or vegetarian. Something with lots of delicious flavours.

8. Waffles or pancakes?
Probably waffles, because I don't own a waffle iron, so they're something special. I can make pancakes any time I want. 

9. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?
It changed by the day. Lawyer, flight attendant, undercover cop, actor, speech pathologist, dentist, artist, concert pianist, aeroplane (when I was very, very little).

10. Do you prefer cooking or baking?
What's the difference? If I assume that cooking means meals and baking means cakes and biscuits, I actually don't mind. I have a bit of a sweet tooth, so baking's good. I also enjoy playing "What can I make with the contents of my fridge?" at dinner time. 

11. What would be your dream job?
Something that involves working with children and making music....wait....

12. Do you make your bed every morning?
Much to my mother's consternation, almost never.

13. Picasso or Norman Rockwell?
Is it really bad that I just looked up Norman Rockwell? Picasso.

14. Do you like carpet, tile, or hardwood floors? 
Hardwood floors for sure. You don't have to vacuum (see question five) and they have a warmer, friendlier feel than tiles. 

15. What is your least favorite thing about yourself??
Physically - I have mild poland syndrome. Personality/habits - my messiness/disorganisation

16. Last movie you watched??
I actually can't remember. It might have been 'Water for Elephants'.

17. Computer or Television??
I use my computer as a TV, so computer. 

18. Favorite Sound?
I love the timbre of the marimba.

19. If you could have a $5000 shopping spree to one store, which store would it be?  

Practically speaking, I'd probably put the money toward a house deposit. But hypothetically,
I'd buy a marimba. That would probably take the entire $5000. Otherwise, I'm going through a bit of a vintage clothing kick at the moment, so maybe a website like modcloth.com.

20. If you could be any Jane Austen fictional character who would you choose (or if you would prefer any fictional character)?  

I'm ashamed to say this out loud, but I really strongly connected with the Mary portrayed in the movie of Pride and Prejudice starring Keira Knightley. (I know, I know, I should be talking about the original novels, or at least the BBC adaptation (which I prefer in almost every way)).


There we go. A little bit more about 'the real me'. Not bad for an anonymous blog. You're welcome.

Am I a Feminist?

Some days I think so, and some I think not. I suppose, like so many things, a definition is key. (Side note: I love words and think languages are fascinating. When I'm a crazy 80-year-old lady who doesn't want to leave any money to her grandkids, I'm going to go back to uni and study linguistics.)
Anyway, the following was found at dictionary.com (my Collins concise is too far away at the moment):
Feminist (adj.): Advocating, social, political, legal and economic rights for women equal to those of men.
(noun): an advocate of such rights.

I guess by that definition, I'm not really a feminist, because I don't spend much time advocating for anything. I do hold a few beliefs and values that some may describe as feminist, but others that might be described as very old-fashioned and steeped in patriarchy.

1) I don't hate men. Many of the men I encounter are lovely creatures. In fact, I like men so much that one day, I hope to marry one.

2) Although I one day wish to get married, I don't discount the importance of what I do as a single woman. I'm working as a music teacher because I think that what I do is important, not because I need something to do to fill in the time before Mr Right comes along to sweep me off my feet.

3) Although I think my job is important, if/when I have children, I'd love to be a stay-at-home mum, at least before my children go to school. I realise that this depends on unknowable future circumstances, but I really appreciate that my mum made the decision to stay home with her kids, and we were always her first priority.

4) An argument I recently read against feminism is that it encouraged sexual promiscuity. I wasn't alive in the 50s and 60s, so I don't know for sure, but apparently there was (still is?) a double standard in terms of appropriate sexual behaviour. I'd like to argue that I don't agree with promiscuity for either men or women. Granted, physical consequences of sex are often greater for women than for men. That's just biology.

5) I dislike most of the stereotypes pertaining to women. The other day, I was browsing through an advertising leaflet from a book shop. There were two facing pages, one with books recommended for men, the other recommending books for women. Both my mother and I thought the books for men (linguistics, science, economics) looked much more interesting than the books for women (fashion and baking). I dislike the picture this paints of shallow, brainless women.

6) I think women should be able to choose any career they want. Engineer, lawyer, teacher, home-maker, hair-dresser, musician. Any of these job titles could equally apply to men. Gender shouldn't play a part in it.

7) I don't think the pay-gap statistics are a paticularly valid argument. More women than men choose to work in lower paying jobs such as childcare, and more men choose to work higher-paid mining jobs, for example. Equal pay for equal work is something I strongly support, although equality between sectors won't be realistic unless Australia suddenly decides that communism is a great idea.

8) Men and women are different, but differences exist between women and between men as well. How many of these differences are innate and how many are taught is something we will probably never know.

Music Education

So just in case anybody was wondering, I'm a music teacher. I'm currently working a hodge-podge of assorted music teaching jobs, which in the course of an average week will see me at three different schools teaching 350 kids over 10 year levels. I do classroom music, specialist singing studies, I direct a choir and assist with the percussion section of a concert band. Sometimes my job(s) drives me crazy, but there are more moments when I can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing.

A couple of weeks ago, I watched a decent talkback show (yes, they do actually exist) in which one of the topics was music education. One of the panellists was Richard Gill, a hero of mine. So many questions from the audience and statements from the twitter feed showed that people really don't have any idea how important a good music education is. It's also something I've been thinking about recently, because it's still not 100% guaranteed that I get any of my jobs back next year. So I really need to think about and articulate why music education is important in schools.

1) Music is unique among the arts in that it is purely abstract. It can suggest images, scenes or moods, but it does not state them.

2) Music is universal. If even profoundly deaf people can respond to music, and in some cases become professional musicians, then there must be something in the art form that speaks to all humanity.

3) Music aids brain development. It builds neural pathways that no other activity can. Music activates more areas of the brain than language. I hate using the argument that music makes people better at maths/language/whatever, because music should be studied for its own merit.

It became apparent from the discussion on the show that a lot of people don't understand what a good music education can be like.

1) Music education is not learning to play an instrument. A lot of people object to music education because of their memories of learning (or more likely, listening to other people learning) the recorder. A good music education involves singing, moving to music, active listening and critical analysis, and most importantly, allowing students to create their own music. This can be aided by learning an instrument, but instruments are not the starting and ending point.

2) Music education is not about imposing western art music on students. A good music education introduces students to a wide variety of music from all times, genres and cultures.

3) Music education is not opposed to sport. The two subjects are unnatural enemies, and often compete in terms of funding and laymans ideas of education. Both are important for completely different reasons. 

4) Music education is important, despite (or perhaps because) it is not one of the 'three Rs'. It teaches students to think critically and creatively, it allows students to think abstractly, without the bounds of language, it encourages students to strive to be the best without offering answers that are either right or wrong. It is not part of the country-wide standardised tests (which are another issue altogether). Removing so-called 'extra-curricular' subjects from the timetable will result in a generation of children who are really good at sitting standardised tests, but have no way of applying any of this knowledge to real world situations.

So if anybody is trawling the internet and is not yet sure about the value of music education, I hope this clears up a few misconceptions.

Modesty

I'm Baaaack! More or less as a method of thinking through my thoughts on a topic that I read about tonight.

For those of you who might be interested, I'm a Christian. For me, that means that I have a personal relationship with Jesus, rather than following a heap of rules and regulations. Anyway, a blog that I really enjoy is Stuff Christians Like, a somewhat satirical series of posts about the culture of American Christianity. Last Friday's post was about what sort of bathers Christian women should wear. The comment section was not quite an out and out war between those who believe that women should dress in a way that does not cause their brothers to stumble (ie: look upon them in lust) and those who think women should  have the freedom to wear whatever they want. I could see the point of the argument on both sides. In order to come a little closer to my decision as to which camp I fit in (which will probably end up as neither), I will write through my thoughts in list form:

1) When I go to the beach, I usually wear a tankini (long-topped two-piece bathing suit). This is mainly because I prefer my internal monologue to be "Beach! Swimming! Sandcastles! Win!" than "Are my bathers covering all the important bits? How about now? Are they still preventing me from being arrested for indecent exposure?". Or, at the other extreme, "I really dislike swimming in this ankle length skirt. It really restricts the ease of movement I need when participating in physical exercise."

2) It seems a logical step for a man to justify lusting after a woman due to what she's wearing, to a man to justifying raping a woman because of what she's wearing. This is totally unacceptable in any circumstance. A few years ago, a muslim mufti made Australian news headlines by comparing scantily-clad women to uncovered meat, saying that if a dog (a man) eats (rapes) a piece of uncovered meat (a scantily-clad woman), it is the fault of the meat, rather than the dog. This doesn't sit well with me on several levels:

• I remember everyone being offended that in this statement, women were called meat. Why didn't anyone raise any objection that men were being called dogs?
• Who uncovered the meat? 

3)  Why do (some) women feel the need to dress at the limit of what is considered socially acceptable anyway?

4) Isn't it a cultural thing as to whether some items of dress are acceptable or not? I remember laughing at a cartoon about the early years of the 20th century about how indecent it was to see a woman's knees.

5) Some people were making the comment that a woman would not answer the door in her bras and undies, but would quite happily swim in a bikini. I would like to point out that bathers and undies are two different things, depending on both the type of material, and whether water is present. (See the trumpet 'simplifying summer' ad for more info on that one)

6) Why are all the 'rules' of modesty directed toward women? C'est ne juste pas!

7) Ultimately, people should question why they wear the clothes they choose to wear? Societal expectations? Comfort? To look hot? To glorify God?

I still haven't reached a definitive conclusion, and I don't think I ever will...

It's been a while.

Dear one or two people that may possibly have read a post on this blog ever,

Sorry it's been a while since I posted. The reason I started in the first place was a procrastination technique. Then I guess I got too involved and needed to procrastinate from this as well. Anyway, I've since finished the project (HOORAY!), got a job teaching in my hometown, so I've moved back in with my parents, at least for the time being. Speaking of parents, they've gone and deserted me for a week, so I have the house to myself. Mother was quite worried that she hadn't left enough frozen meals for one in the freezer, so I'm keeping a photo journal (again) to prove to all and sundry that I actually can look after myself. Here, for what its worth, is today's effort:

It's zucchini spaghetti. (Sorry that I'm too technologically incompetent to rotate photos. I think you might have to do it before you upload them, but I'm too lazy to go through that whole rigarmarole)

This delicious and very easy recipe basically involved cooking spaghetti, grating a whole zucchini, frying it with onion, garlic, a bit of ginger, paprika, pepper and oregano until the zucchini water boils away, and serving the zucchini with hot pasta, avocado oil and parmesan cheese. It's a dish with robust, peasant-y flavours that isn't afraid to be itself. A bit more colour contrast would have been good on the presentation side - food shouldn't be monochrome. There were also a few too many dishes, considering I was cooking for one:

I mean, what's with that? The good news is, I made enough for lunch tomorrow, too.